Once upon a time, I got paid to watch television and movies and to represent their dialogue and sound effects in text form with accuracy and precision. I was mentored in this work by a real editor who tapped my propensity for second-guessing myself and validated my dictionary worship. I was encouraged to embrace my anal-retentiveness and to apply it in exciting new ways. The job was a kind of English major’s refuge, nay, a little chunk of paradise. (I majored in linguistics and Italian, which is close enough.)
But I left that desert oasis for the greener pastures of Oregon, and now I sometimes feel bereft of an editorial outlet. In my current position (at an institution of higher learning, interestingly), my timid, unsanctioned efforts to raise the quality of our textual output are often met coldly by colleagues who probably disdain me as a grammatical Goody Two-shoes.
Thus I lamented to Scott during a Friday-night rant, and he sweetly and thoughtfully wished that I might harness my verbal prowess to some noble cause. How such gentle encouragement from someone you love can inspire confidence and creativity! Around town yesterday afternoon, I began to see the possibilities: a flyer by the Corvallis chapter of the Northwest Earth Institute deploring “the Wal-Mart affect,” a street sign tagged to read “Stop driveing”…
McSweeney’s Pseudonyms for Literature Majors was merely lightly amusing until I encountered “The Brothers Tearhisarmsoff.” I was then overcome with cardio-endangering spasms, salt water squirting from my face, laughing like an idiot.
Thankyou! Thankyou, P. Saga for the much needed comic relief! I’ve been feeling rather feeble lately, but that episode has instilled in me new hope that I am indeed of robust health; had I not been, surely I’d have died of stroke or heart failure just now. I seriously almost fell off my chair!
Well, shit, L. Claude. I kinda wish I’d written it myself! Very glad to hear that you’re off your back and back in your chair.
Less witty than McSweeney’s but humbly yours,
p.saga
Oh great and powerful Oz, how does one transcribe laughter? Help, au secours, May-Day, oh great One! Please, find a CC better than *laughter* which just does not convey the diaphramic banging, the ribs rolling, the balance altering of healthy delight! Of course, for me it was Jane Eyre’s contribution.
Love you girls.