Man, why didn’t I get to star in this video?

Man, the creators of this deliciously awful Reagan-era War on Drugs music video were way off. Having now seen that the David Hasselhoff poster in my bedroom might spring to life and serenade me, I’m actually more tempted to try drugs! But don’t worry. I’d probably just get hooked on a feeling.

Why didn’t I get to star in this video? Alas, in 1985-1986, it would be a few more years before I hit my faux-goth, sulky girl, teenage years, and I just didn’t fit the part. I was, however, a huge Whitney Houston fan at that time. I used to don my leotard, tights, and leg warmers, play her exotically orange debut album on the record player, and make up dance routines to “How Will I Know?” in my dad’s living room.

Nostalgia trip courtesy of boingboing and Scott, who lovingly shares the best of that burgeoning blog when I can’t keep up with it myself.

10 Responses to “Man, why didn’t I get to star in this video?”

  1. BOZWIGGLE Says:

    I couldn’t make it through that. However, then I skipped ahead to the Hasselhoff HOOKED ON A FEELING, and that made my night, which was not going well up until that point. I can’t imagine that anything funnier exists in the world. (It’s even better than Jar Barf perhaps, if David Robidenza will permit me to venture out on that precarious limb.) When he starts flapping his arms along with the birds I completely lost it, and, as with all really top-drawer stuff, it doesn’t stop there. There was plenty more to come. A true gem. I’ll try the anti-drug one again on Monday. Although your somewhat embarrassing Whitney Houston dress-up anecdote gave me quite a chuckle as well. Post some pictures! Oh, man, that would be priceless. I bet someone’s got pictures…

  2. pedestriansaga Says:

    Hi, um, BOZWIGGLE. (?) Very glad Hasselhoff and I could embarrass ourselves so effectively for your benefit. No childhood pictures. Yet. Check back.

  3. Dennis Cozzalio Says:

    Jesus, that was depressing, especially seeing Whitney Houston… Most frightening moment: when your garbageman turns out to be Arnold Schwarzenegger!

  4. Deke Babamoto Says:

    Speaking of drugs—
    the place I work is now officially fueled by Red Bull, Benadryl and Vicodine. There’s a lot of hallway mumbling, somebody breaks out in sung non-sequitur at every meeting and management regularly supplies the proles with suspiciously free starchy lunches disguised as ethnic adventures.
    Zombies with stale pizza stains on their clothing wander the office at all hours of the night moaning for Kool-Aid. Some guy you haven’t seen in six months suddenly materializes behind your workstation at midnight asking if you need something at Pavilions. The gay guys have gone straight and the straight guys were all laid off and the beauty parlor is filled with sailors. Dogs and babies are everywhere. Promising rock careers, healthy relationships and normal lives are dreamy concept-fodder. About a half dozen people have either gained or lost staggering amounts of weight and assumed new identities. And, all the while, the massive air conditioning units on the roof of the office continue to pump arctic air over everything and everyone.
    Every time I sit down at my cubicle, I’m overwhelmed by a feelings of sadness and despair.
    And the only sound that’s left after the ambulances go
    Is Cinderella sweeping up on Desolation Row.
    So, how you doin’, PSaga?

  5. BOZWIGGLE Says:

    I knew there was a good reason I wanted to read more replies frm Deke Babamoto!!

  6. Dennis Cozzalio Says:

    Deke has just given us the surreal jolt of a mini Lars Von Trier movie without the annoyance of having to actually sit through one of that director’s awful films. Dreamy concept fodder, indeed! And that penultimate sentence– that’s John Cafferty and the Beaver Brown Band, right? Thanks, Deke! Now back to my Red Bull and NyQuil cocktail…

  7. BOZWIGGLE Says:

    I finally did finish watching the drug music video, and it had some hilarious moments. The Schwarzenegger gap-tooth grin may have been the best. It’s tough to get through since the song is so awful and repetitive. Hooked on a Feeling, even when cheesed up, at least has some appealing melodic hook.

  8. L. Claude Says:

    Oh! I thought Deke was simply describing something like a highschool reunion! But in fear of that kind of situation, I didn’t go to mine so I really wouldn’t know.

  9. pedestriansaga Says:

    Dennis! Um, Deke! Thanks! I am your humble servant. You make my blog a much better place - dreamy concept fodder always welcome.

    I wonder what Deke Babamoto would think of the ’80s Man. (Thanks, L. Claude!)

  10. Deke Babamoto Says:

    Hey, PSaga. Buongiorno, bubeleh.
    It’s been nearly a year since my last post.
    “’80s Man”? Nah!
    I was already married and settled down by the ’80s.
    I am a child of the Sixties! Dig it—

    Surry down to a stoned soul picnic.

    Hope you all are doing good.

    D. Babamoto

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