Beware my periwinkle grasshopper leap and invincible hummingbird hands, O smarmy wedding crashers!
Thursday, July 21st, 2005Well, I’m back from helping my little sister get hitched. The wedding seemed to go off without a hitch. Good thing those creeps Vince Vaughn and Owen Wilson didn’t show up though, or I might have been forced to take them out with my thunderous, emasculating, maid-of-honor peri-blossom slam– you know, to wipe that shit-eating smirk and pompous pout right off their smug little mugs.
Oh, that reminds me that the first song the deejay played at the reception was Franz Ferdinand’s “Take Me Out.” Thank you, deejay friend of the groom! It made me do a happy dance. Or maybe it was the champagne and riesling and pinot noir.
Hmm. You know, come to think of it, I’d have welcomed that wacky Christopher Walken. Shucks, you think he’d have danced with me? Anyhoo…
My sincere congratulations to the newlyweds! It was indeed an honor to participate in the celebration of your marriage! And in such truly amazing company!